Finding Happiness In Daily Living
“Where will I find my happiness?” : A question that constantly popped (and still does) in my head as I entered my 20s. Still adjusting to the ‘routine’ of competing with my peers in college and later working in sales full-time, I wondered if any of this fell under my umbrella of happiness. Realistically speaking, the answer is- No, it did not. Later, I realized how I was to be blamed for the fact that it didn’t.
“To find happiness, look halfway between too little and too much.”
It’s a quote that I randomly came across last year when I felt directionless in my career while being swamped with rejections during college placements. Even though I did not understand what it meant at first, I spent all my days thinking about these lines for the next few months.
I will not dig deep into the completely subjective definition of happiness. In this blog post, I am giving an outline of what I understood from my conscious thinking and experiences over the last couple of months.
An Overview of Our Time
All of us spend our time every day doing one of the below three things:
Time spent alone, i.e. me-time
Time spent with others
Time spent at work
It is pretty obvious then that the moments we define as precious, i.e. the ones that truly make us happy, lie in one or all of these experiences.
I have made a list of practices which could lead you to find happiness in the monotony of life. I hope this could bring a fresh perspective for you to approach the monotony differently.
Finding Happiness In Relationships (With Others + Oneself)
In his book Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down, Haemin Sunim talks about an interesting concept about relationships. He explains how relationships are like sitting by a fireplace: if you’re sitting too close all the time, you’ll see how it’ll start burning. And if you are too far, you will not feel warm enough.
Finding that balance in every relationship is a little complex. But if you start noticing the small moments and how much meaning they add to your life, happiness will seek you.
1. Be Intentional
Be intentional with the time you spend with others. Do little things for your loved ones to make them happy. Call your parents and chat about your day. Send a box of doughnuts to a friend who’s having a bad day. Get home-cooked food for your outstation friends at college.
While these small gestures will be appreciated by your loved ones, they will also end up making you feel happier.
2. Acknowledge Your Relationships and Be Grateful
I try to make a mental list of all the things that I was grateful for in the day before sleeping. This 2-minute practice each day has had a significant impact on my life, not only in terms of having a peaceful sleep but also in acknowledging the key relationships and fixing the fragile ones.
The moment you acknowledge the relationships you have and understand how these add value to your life, you’ll notice a sense of peace and a feeling of being loved, which in a true sense may be the happiness you were looking for all along.
3. Prioritise ‘Me-Time’
The most important thing is to recognize the relationship you have with yourself. Do you spend most of your alone time scrolling through the phone? Is there a hobby that you are currently pursuing?
Whatever it is that you are doing, how much value is it adding to your growth as an individual?
I try to be intentional with my ‘me-time’. On some days, I paint. On others, I just read my book while sipping on green tea and the sound of tranquil music playing in the background. Although there are multiple things that I enjoy doing alone, one that always stands out is reconnecting with nature. Relaxed stroll in the park on a warm winter afternoon, listening to the birds chirping and soaking in the sun. This is what makes me feel content the most.
I highly recommend that you consciously spend some time alone during the day and focus on doing small yet meaningful things that you enjoy doing.
Finding Happiness In Work
1. Find Purpose (No Matter How Small It May Be)
This is where I struggle the most.
Regardless of whether you are a student or a working professional, it is imperative to find meaning in the work that you do.
You are lucky if you have found a job that you love. In my entire journey of working in retail for seven months, I questioned my purpose every day. Oddly enough, last day conversations with the restaurant owners whom I worked with for all those months made me understand a minuscule but noticeable impact that I created- I was there when some of them just started and I was leaving when they were doing above-average business each month.
Sometimes, we don’t realize that even the littlest things can create a huge impact on someone else’s life. And although I did not enjoy most days at my job, an early realization of this impact that I was creating would have given me a sense of satisfaction and delight that I think would’ve been helpful on days that were rough at work.
Our happiness is, indeed, found in the smallest moments.
In closing the laptop after a hectic day at work on a Friday, in family gatherings (sometimes xD), in catch-up lunches, in studying an entire chapter of the syllabus in one go without distractions (for me at least xD), in watching a movie with a friend on zoom, in eating ice-cream with family on a cold winter’s night.
The list is endless if you start noticing!